Which fan boy are you?

From slashdot by Anonymous Coward

1. Windows
   You wear wraparound sunglasses, even indoors. You wish your mother would let you ride a motorbike. You tell your friends you're pulling in $50,000 a year and $2,000 a month "playing the stock market" but in reality you're only bringing in half that and your dividends from MSFT havn't been good in years. Your non computing friends all turn to you for help; you only charge $30 an hour. Your collegues talk about you behind your back. Your workplace nickname is likely to be "The Asshole". Unlike the Linux fanboys, you actually try to pick up dates in bars but women laugh at you.
   你即便在室内也要戴放风太阳镜。你希望母亲能让你骑摩托。你告诉你的朋友你年收入$50k，每月“玩玩股票”就赚$2K。但事实上你只挣了一半那么多。你从MSFT（注：微软在NASDAQ的代码）分的红利几年来都不怎么样。你的非计算机类同好都找你帮忙；你一小时收费区区$30。你的同事背着你说你的闲话。你在单位的绰号可能是“The Asshole”（自己翻译吧）。不像Linux fanboy们，实际上你想在酒吧里钓mm但被其取笑。
   
2. Apple
   You think you're so cool you hurt. You have mirrors on every wall in your "loft apartment", which is really a grimy little apartment next to a guy who plays Guns 'n Roses at 3am. All of your furniture is from Ikea. You sometimes think that changing your name to "Steve" would be "pretty cool". When you go to bars you only drink Miller Lite. No body ever asks you for help with their computers because they know you don't know anything but OS X, even if you do tell them you "run Unix" now. Your friends openly laugh at you.
   你认为你酷到很受伤。你“阁楼公寓”的每一面墙上都有镜子——但实际上只是一间污秽不堪的狭小公寓，隔壁还住着一个半夜3点玩Guns 'n Roses的家活。你所有的家具都是Ikea的。你有时认为把名字改成“Steve”会“比较酷”。当你来到酒吧你只喝Miller Lite。没人曾向你寻求电脑方面的帮助，因为他们知道你除了OS X什么都不知道，尽管你的确告诉过他们你现在“运行Unix”了。你的朋友公开的嘲笑你。
   
3. Linspire
   You regularly give $10 bills to homeless guys because you have too much money. Computers baffle you, but you enjoy looking at pictures of naked women. You don't know what Linux is, but you continually bugged the IT guy at work about your computer he installed Linspire on your machine.
   你经常性的给无家可归的人$10钞票，因为你的钱太多了。电脑是你的困扰，但你乐于看裸体mm的图片。你不知道什么是Linux，但你总是为了你的电脑惹火了你身旁的IT人员，于是他们给你装了Linspire。
   
4. Umbongo
   You shop at GAP. You probably used to use a Mac. When you saw the multiracial image used as a desktop picture and heard that this operating system came from the same country as Nelson Mandella, you knew it was for you. You meet with your friends in fair-trade coffee houses and talk about the eventual overthrow of evil corporations such as Microsoft and Starbucks. Like the Linspire user, you have very little real knowlege when it comes to computers but you would never use your computer to look at pictures of women degrading themselves.
   你在GAP购物。你可能曾用Mac。当你看见用做桌面图案的多民族图片且听说该操作系统来自纳尔逊.曼德拉的国度，你明白它就是为了你而存在的。你在公平贸易咖啡屋会见你的朋友，讨论邪恶公司如微软、星巴克等的最终废除。就像Linspire用户一样，你对你的电脑一样缺乏了解但你绝不用电脑看自甘堕落的mm。
   
5. Gentoy
   You've been "into computers" for ohh, one or two years now and fancy yourself as "a bit of a hacker". Wouldn't know C from C++, or even Perl for that matter. Older Gentoy users may be building their homes from matchsticks. You've explained to all your friends that your matchstick house will have an "optimised floorplan". They've tried to tell you that your house violates every known building code and law in your area, but you've ignored them so far because you can't read those complicated regulatory documents.
   你已经“掉进电脑”有，哦，一两年了吧。你把自己幻想成“有一点黑客”。不为此而从C++了解C，或者甚至是Perl。较老的Gentoy用户可能从火柴棍开始打造自家房屋。你向所有朋友解释过你的火柴棍房屋将有一个“优化的平面图”。他们试图告诉你，你的房屋违反了当地每一条已知的建筑法律法规。但你一直以来对他们的建议视而不见因为你无法读懂那些复杂的规范文档。
   
6. Linux From Scratch
   Much like the Gentoy user but you'd also be into sadomasochistic sex if you could get it. You're not just building a house from matchsticks, you're planing to grow the trees to make the matchsticks. You've cleared some land but don't know what to do next because you havn't read the books you've got, so you've posted to alt.arborists.newbie asking for help. It's been three days so far and no one has replied. You remain hopeful.
   大体类似Gentoy用户，但如果可能你更愿意参与SM。你盖房子不仅从火柴棍开始，你还在计划栽树并制造火柴棍。你清空一块地但不知道下面该做什么，因为你还没阅读你弄来的书，所以你在alt.arborists.newbie讨论组发帖寻求帮助。三天以来没人回贴。你还保持着希望。
7. Amiga

   You are a bitter person, twisted by how unfair the world is to have ignored your choice of system and operating system. You still think it is the late 80s, and don’t realise that everybody else has caught up, gone past and then lapped you. Oddly enough you hate your neighbour, also an Amiga fanboy, because they have a blue front door. You have a collection of Amiga t-shirts, including a XXXL Amiga Inc t-shirt sent out 3 years after you paid $50 to try and keep your platform alive. You current hardware uses a 5 year old VIA southbridge, and you need to use a PCI card IDE controller because of it. You don’t really know how computers work despite having used one for nearly 20 years. You still think that PCs have no custom chips and use the original x86 instruction set.
   你是个悲惨的人，被“世界如此不公，忽略了我对系统和操作系统的选择”扭曲。你认为自己还活在80年代，没有意识到每个人都跟上形势，离开并把你甩下。很偶然的你会恨你的邻居，另一个Amiga fanboy，因为他们有蓝色的前门。你收集了一堆Amiga T恤，包括一件XXXL Amiga Inc T恤，是3年前你付了$50想让你的平台活着而得到的。你目前的硬件是5岁的VIA南桥，你因此需要用PCI卡IDE控制器。尽管用了将近20年，你并不真正了解电脑如何工作。你还以为PC没法配置芯片，使用的还是x86指令集。